On miscarriages

I've read lots of good blog posts lately on the importance of mothers who have a miscarriage (as so many do) being able to get support for their loss and therelated  importance of acknowledging that all life, even at six weeks after conception with just a tiny heartbeat, is precious. But I also feel like there's a certain "therefore, we need to need to announce our pregnancy right away" push, and here, to paraphrase the Apostle Paul, it seems like she who announces her pregnancy immediately does well and so does she who waits till the traditional 12-14 weeks (or later). 

I think what is important is feeling that you CAN mourn the loss of a baby, no matter the stage of pregnancy; and speaking from my own experience, it really, really helps to be able to talk to another woman who has walked that path before you. There are so many emotions, so many questions about what to expect. Gross things that it helps to be prepared for, even. These are not things you will probably want to talk about on facebook. So I guess what i'm trying to say is, share your pregnancy news with close friends and family early on, and you won't regret it no matter the outcome. And if, God forbid, you get that very disappointing news at a 10-week ultrasound and it would ease your pain to publicly acknowledge your real loss, you should! But if you need time with grief, talk to a friend or two you can trust, and let the healing begin before you share. 

And once you share about it, you'll find a surprising number of friends who have experienced similar losses, although none is exactly the same as yours.