I downloaded a book a while ago called Desperate: Hope for Mothers Who Need to Breathe (or something like that), and i wish i has started it ages ago. But heck, I'm still pretty desperate. :) One of the chapters I read today mentioned how selfishness so easily complicates things. It's one thing to be exhausted and worn out - because that is just a fact of motherhood - but another when you start to resent your husband or kids for the wear and tear they put on the house or you hate time spent with a small child clinging to you. For me that really is one of the things that makes it hardest - my own heart. Yet some of the times i enjoy being a mom the most are when i embrace jt and say bring on the slobber and noise, yo. (I haven't been watching Breaking Bad too much.)
What i appreciate about this book, though, is how there is a flip side to this: who you are as a person is essential to your home, and you do need time (whenever possible) to use those skills and preferences to bring joy to your family. I'm still at the stuck-to-a-small-baby stage, but it won't last, and in the meantime I feel encouraged to keep on going. It's directly thanks to this chapter that I lit a candle and dinner last night, much to Kaylen's awe.
And thanks to Jason suggesting chicken and rice as i was tearing my hair out trying to think of something to make with chicken breasts, we had a delicious knock off version of NYC street food. Halel (?) chicken with saffron rice and fries...and caramelized parsnips, a new favorite.
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